When society looks down

When society looks down upon something, isn't it sometimes for a reason? There's much discussion in adoption debate about young girls being supported in keeping their babies. That although it's not as shameful as it once was, it's still discouraged and these young mothers are encouraged to relinquish, or something. That the amount of support necessary to enable them isn't there, whether it be in the form of social assistance or familial aid. My question is, what if it was? I mean, birth control exists for a reason, right? Females of all ages at some point in their life fear/dread getting pregnant. I think I can safely say that most females in their teens fall in to this category. Why is that? Well, for me, it was likely first and foremost that my mom would have "killed me". Second I think it must have been I didn't want to have a baby I couldn't keep, like my biological mother. Other than that, I don't think I had a reason. I wasn't one of the people who had education/career goals. My biggest goal was moving out on my own. Another goal was to have a child someday, originally on my own because I didn't think I was marriage material, that I didn't need to have a father in the picture, and possibly I used to imagine I would adopt a baby who needed a home although this is not a concrete memory so I'm not positive I felt that way. I think I did at some point though. Having said all that, I can state that even though having a child was one of my biggest goals in life I did everything humanly possible to make sure I didn't have one when I shouldn't, and I didn't.

Now, what if I hadn't been afraid of my mom "killing me". Or if I'd not known that I needed the resources to raise a child, that if I didn't have them my child could be lost to me. I'll never know for sure of course but my bet is that there's a good chance I'd have gotten pregnant before I was ready and it's a crap shoot what would have happened after that. I have three friends that found themselves pregnant when they didn't want to be and one had an abortion, one relinquished, and one kept the baby. The one who kept the baby found herself pregnant late in life, at a time when she thought she was done with babies so it's not a surprise she had the child, kept it, and is living happily ever after.

So, here's my point, I'm wondering what would happen if it was okay. That it would be no big deal if females getting pregnant as soon as they're physically able (and that's young!) was completely socially acceptable, if they were embraced and supported by government and family here in North America.

Please know I'm not saying women shouldn't be supported in unexpected, unintended pregnancy. I'm all for maternity and paternity leave, parental leave, welfare assistance for those in need, child tax benefits, grandparents babysitting off and on, baby showers, high school programs for teen moms etc, and if my son messes up and becomes a dad before he is ready I'll help him, that's a no brainer. I'll "kill him", but I'll help him.

Can't wait to be a grandma!