tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5210353425616744235.post1543463318105318910..comments2023-04-13T02:42:31.179-07:00Comments on And other ideas and thoughts ....: Pick on someone your own sizeCampbellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13600505149020853906noreply@blogger.comBlogger42125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5210353425616744235.post-90677850052713277562010-03-01T17:15:30.187-08:002010-03-01T17:15:30.187-08:00Oh, there it is. You're right CP, your mom sou...Oh, there it is. You're right CP, your mom sounds quite a bit like me, just with waaay more relatives lol.Campbellhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13600505149020853906noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5210353425616744235.post-64913602385739652312010-03-01T15:39:57.569-08:002010-03-01T15:39:57.569-08:00Hi CP, thanks for your last comment. I read it, we...Hi CP, thanks for your last comment. I read it, went to respond and seem to have lost it somehow, sorry!Campbellhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13600505149020853906noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5210353425616744235.post-2585188062656279572010-03-01T10:27:48.531-08:002010-03-01T10:27:48.531-08:00Hi Campbell,
my mom's reunion is going very we...Hi Campbell,<br />my mom's reunion is going very well. They stay in contact pretty regularly.<br />My mother is very pragmatic, so there wasn't as much stress over the meeting as other adoptees might have (based on what I've read elsewhere).<br />Mom also has 8 or 9 other half-siblings (trying to name them in my head right now), so its been pretty interesting for her to go from having just a brother to being part of such a large family. They have all been very welcoming to her (and us).<br />I think for my mom there came a time where she finally felt that she did indeed want to know who her bio family was and what medical history she could get. It started there, and grew. <br />I don't want to get into too many details on a public blog about my mother's story. Mom always knew the circumstances of her adoption (which were accurate), accepted them and had no regrets about them. Nor does her mother -- that doesn't mean that she didn't miss my mom or that she didn't love her, it was just simply the best decision she could make at that time for both of them.<br />The one thing I've learned over the years is that every adoptive story is different. I wish you the best of luck in your search. I plan to keep reading as I really find what you have to say importnat. I will definitely send my mom this way.<br />CPAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5210353425616744235.post-78493426251646143342010-02-24T15:01:03.420-08:002010-02-24T15:01:03.420-08:00Yes, sorry, I get that Mei Ling.
I thought you w...Yes, sorry, I get that Mei Ling. <br /><br />I thought you were saying that it's easier for me to talk about adoption in real life because I "endlessly praise adoption".<br /><br />Thanks for clarifying.Campbellhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13600505149020853906noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5210353425616744235.post-65229654079415592252010-02-24T14:56:06.793-08:002010-02-24T14:56:06.793-08:00Oh yeah, that'd be some story CP!
Has your mo...Oh yeah, that'd be some story CP!<br /><br />Has your mom's reunion gone pretty well? I guess likely so if it's been that long already.Campbellhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13600505149020853906noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5210353425616744235.post-3079233374934986272010-02-24T13:30:04.332-08:002010-02-24T13:30:04.332-08:00"As far as me endlessly praising adoption in ..."As far as me endlessly praising adoption in real life, that's a bit of a stretch."<br /><br />My point was to convey that any time an adoptee attempts to criticize adoption or point out a negative aspect of it, they are silenced.Mei Linghttp://sisterheping.wordpress.com/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5210353425616744235.post-25254424174041540872010-02-24T06:17:28.258-08:002010-02-24T06:17:28.258-08:00HI Campbell,
My mom is in reunion with her birth m...HI Campbell,<br />My mom is in reunion with her birth mother and has been for about 7-8 years now and to my knowledge mom was the only one given up. Typical story of the BSE, (very) young, unwed, no family support. Wouldn't that have been a story though, family found through blog!<br />CPAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5210353425616744235.post-73023099013261770792010-02-23T17:46:30.851-08:002010-02-23T17:46:30.851-08:00Hey CP, thanks for commenting. It seems like you u...Hey CP, thanks for commenting. It seems like you understood what I was trying to say. <br /><br />Hmmm....I remind you of your mom, eh? And she's adopted? Maybe we're sisters ; )Campbellhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13600505149020853906noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5210353425616744235.post-12891800472812775922010-02-23T17:40:16.606-08:002010-02-23T17:40:16.606-08:00Mei Ling : ) I love your comments and posts. It a...Mei Ling : ) I love your comments and posts. It always seems like you've really read what your commenting on and your posts always touch me.<br /><br />I see what you're saying about getting a different reaction depending on your view of adoption. I didn't think of that.<br /><br />As far as me endlessly praising adoption in real life, that's a bit of a stretch. For sure I'm not against it and until lately I didn't much think about the downfalls, repercussions, or corruption. I just didn't know. Given my experience, which is all until this point I've had to go by, it seemed like a great solution to a sad/difficult/tragic/impossible/terrifying (you pick the word) situation. I still think it can be. Things is, it's obviously often not. <br /><br />If you want to find any redeeming quality in my "voice", maybe you can find it in the fact that I am now aware and I still have no problem talking about adoption in real life. Who knows, maybe hearing about the "dark side" of adoption (as it's now become known around here) from someone who's not suffered devastating consequences as a result of it may have an impact. Or not.<br /><br />One thing I know for sure though, I am just as adopted as anyone else, which makes my outlook and voice as important (or unimportant) as anyone else.Campbellhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13600505149020853906noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5210353425616744235.post-60925377683178414462010-02-23T14:04:10.329-08:002010-02-23T14:04:10.329-08:00"Funny you say that though, one thing I'v..."Funny you say that though, one thing I've observed is that more than a few online people who are very vocal online seem very "private" about adoption in their real life."<br /><br />Because it's too easy to be negated, silenced, dismissed by people in real life. <br /><br />At least, that is how it's been in my experience of trying to educate the outside world.<br /><br />Of course, I don't endlessly praise adoption, either. ;)Mei Linghttp://sisterheping.wordpress.com/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5210353425616744235.post-54924010159351785942010-02-23T07:26:31.798-08:002010-02-23T07:26:31.798-08:00Hi Campbell,
I came to your blog by way of a prosp...Hi Campbell,<br />I came to your blog by way of a prospective adoptive parents blog that you post on. I've been lurking for awhile, reading some of your other posts.<br />Please don't take this the wrong way buy you remind me a lot of my mom(she's adopted) and how she feels about her adoption.<br />And now to my point, as someone who is an AP and reads a lot of adoption forums and blogs, I found this particular post dead on! I've seen too much of what you wrote about.<br /><br />I've seen so many comments to a young, expectant mother to the effect of "you're horrible if you keep your child, what could you possibly give them at your age" or "you're a horrible person for giving you're child up because they will grow up to hate you." Similar comments are made to teen adoptees to the effect of "your real parents are your birthparents" or "how could you consider contact that horrible woman who gave you up."<br />These types of comments make me cringe, and they come from all sides of the adoption triad. People writing these have no idea the emotional state the person on the other end is in. They only know their own feelings and are projecting them onto this person. <br /><br />Like you I find myself either not commenting at all or recommending these people seek out counseling.<br /><br />I'm so glad I found your blog and will continue to read.<br />CPAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5210353425616744235.post-42221425096767863302010-02-23T05:28:03.575-08:002010-02-23T05:28:03.575-08:00I've reread my post for what feels like the mi...I've reread my post for what feels like the millionth time.<br /><br />I can't see what all the fuss is about. It's merely an observation of the internet (with a focus on adoption) and how hostile it can be. How people are bullied and intimidated, and about the lack of rational, mature discussion. About telling young people whom we don't know what to do. It's not directed at any particular venue or particular group of people, I read lots of stuff by all types of people. It's about how teens may be being affected by our, us adults, behavior and treatment of each other online. I don't say adoption shouldn't be talked about but instead criticize the manner in which it is. In my pea size brain I don't see how this point of view is controversial, or even arguable.<br /><br />I do feel remiss in the fact that I did not address one group of people that frighten me so much that I can't even stomach reading their blogs. I'm referring to the overly "religious" people that say everything is God's intention, that people get pregnant because God wants others to have their children, or whatever it is that they say. Oh man, how I hate "God wanted it that way because..." rationale, for anything! <br /><br />In a sad way I think some of the comments that I've gotten support my assessment of this (adoption) blog world.Campbellhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13600505149020853906noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5210353425616744235.post-72884135110551228342010-02-23T04:34:41.826-08:002010-02-23T04:34:41.826-08:00Hey Lori
"So, in telling a teenager that it ...Hey Lori<br /><br />"So, in telling a teenager that it is the right choice - which I believe I saw several times in responses, etc. - for her or him to allow adoption or give up their child, you are condeming them to a life that you know nothing about."<br /><br />If this means you think you saw me tell a teen(s) to give up their baby(s), nooo way! Would never, ever do something like that, not in real life or online, especially online...that's the point of my post.<br /><br />I understand genetics and am as curious as the next guy about who I look like, although I now think I know what bmom looks like and aging ain't gonna be pretty. She appears much healthier physically than my mom though. Oh well, I may eventually look older than my mom (by adoption) but at least I haven't inherited the crazy gene. <br /><br />I also understand nurture and environmental influence.<br /><br />I absolutely agree that adoption shouldn't be shrouded in hushed voices. I never shut up about being adopted and now about about my letter to bmom, seeing pictures, all that I've learned here online about birthmothers, adoptees, aparents. Funny you say that though, one thing I've observed is more than a few online people who are very vocal online seem very private about adoption in their "real" life.<br /><br />Oh yeah, the part about it having no bearing on my bmom's life (not sure if I said exactly that but whatever) she said that, not me. She said she doesn't pine away for me, cry on my birthday, think about me everyday. I was just relieved to hear it.<br /><br />As always Lori, thanks for the assessment of my post.Campbellhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13600505149020853906noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5210353425616744235.post-547315351568105692010-02-22T21:35:06.479-08:002010-02-22T21:35:06.479-08:00Campbell and all you lovely people out there,
Fir...Campbell and all you lovely people out there,<br /><br />First, Campbell in a very real way, you are right. And in a very real way, you are wrong.<br /><br />Teens will listen to strangers, yes, but they also are well aware, thanks to the internet, that there are a lot of unhappy people out there. So, protecting them from themselves will not help them in the real world. At the same time, as responsible (used very loosely) adults, we should remember that just because there is a world that you, Campbell, did not experience, does not mean we have to push their faces into it either.<br /><br />Wrong in that you don't know what it is like to be a first mother. So, in telling a teenager that it is the right choice - which I believe I saw several times in responses, etc. - for her or him to allow adoption or give up their child, you are condeming them to a life that you know nothing about.<br /><br />Some adoptions are exactly what they were meant to be. I believe this, sincerely and most definitely. Unfortunately, most are not. The majority of adoptions are not for the best reasons and leave a child vulnerable to very negative living conditions.<br /><br />Also, as I read it, I realize that you mean the best, but you come from a world that for most of us does not exist. Many more than you want to believe - middle class America. Having lived for a long time, I know that most people do not live in that class, most live in a world where struggles of daily living can overwhelm.<br /><br />There is also the fact that you out of hand and deliberately dismiss the simplest thing - genetics. Whether you want to believe it or not, genetics are what created the core of your being. For you, apparently, your adoptive family are close enough in genetic memory to have few issues with internal adjustments to familial culture. Things like depression, as you stated, are sometimes genetic. But so is sense of humor (yes, fact), ability to handle certain kinds of stressors and thousands of little things that are all part of you, how you perceive yourself and how others perceive you.<br /><br />So, when talking about adoption, the best that I can say is this: Adoption should not be shrouded in hushed voices and half-truths, it should only be when there is a real need, and it should be (for the first parents) a decision that is made with all the facts. And, dear Campbell, the fact is that you can pretend it had no bearing on your first mothers life but it did. It always will. So, for a teenager who is pregnant, scared and alone the "choice" of adoption is not a choice at all, because choices of that magnitude should be made with all the facts, ugly or not, and not with the belief that all will be beautiful or all will be ugly. And most of all not with the lie that we (mothers) ever will forget and we never really move on. <br /><br />So, maybe, in spite of the dark side - LOL - of adoption it is a good thing that there is a voice out there with more than just the party line for, by your own admission, a large number of very unethical and uncaring people.Lorihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05815710859859029536noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5210353425616744235.post-62328573831233754922010-02-21T13:34:26.103-08:002010-02-21T13:34:26.103-08:00Sorry Jenna. You're right in what you're s...Sorry Jenna. You're right in what you're saying I'm just concerned about how specific the comment was. I understand that you were trying to explain and the only reason I removed it was concern for others involved.Campbellhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13600505149020853906noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5210353425616744235.post-19135349540330114992010-02-21T12:03:31.802-08:002010-02-21T12:03:31.802-08:00Why did you remove my comment of all of them? That...Why did you remove my comment of all of them? That totally sucks. I feel that I was the most straight-forward in trying to explain what exactly it was that the confusion/frustration was all about. I was not attacking, rather simply trying to explain, because there seemed to be some miscommunication. I guess I'm a little shocked, I've never had a comment removed before and feel that I was unfairly singled out, of all the comments you chose to remove mine, which was not inflammatory or accusatory, simply explanatory.Jennahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09548140576365758466noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5210353425616744235.post-38191468435030664702010-02-20T15:39:30.511-08:002010-02-20T15:39:30.511-08:00For those from a particular forum who continue to ...For those from a particular forum who continue to send comments regarding my post please know I'm reading them. I more than likely won't post them as they're so specific, not to mention they misrepresent my commentary there. I've reread all my posts and for the most part they were generic at best and nothing I'm ashamed of. <br /><br />I repeat, this blog post that has provided an opportunity to attack me is not directly related to that forum. It's the atmosphere everywhere, including my blog now. <br /><br />I see how the members support each other there and I can see how it's therapeutic and helpful to most. I have no argument and support it wholeheartedly but it's obvious my feelings and words don't fit in, and that's ok. I had already figured that out after the way the last thread I commented on unfolded.Campbellhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13600505149020853906noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5210353425616744235.post-66528589807616557782010-02-20T13:53:40.937-08:002010-02-20T13:53:40.937-08:00We are obviously incapable of agreeing. Fine. I wi...We are obviously incapable of agreeing. Fine. I will leave you to think what you will. I have tried to engage in a polite way, but you find me obviously rude. The feeling is mutual.Katharinehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01533662877822544180noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5210353425616744235.post-82738985449138161312010-02-20T12:56:19.566-08:002010-02-20T12:56:19.566-08:00Newhall you wrote that I said, "You say you &...Newhall you wrote that I said, "You say you "shudder to think" what "negative" thoughts about adoption would have done to the teen you." and that is not what I said. What I referred to was behavior on blogs and forums and never once mentioned the word negative, never mind negative thoughts about adoption! I understand use of quotations but I am not alright with people twisting and misquoting which is one of the major points of my blog post. Quoting someone does help a person understand which part of a statement is being addressed but what you did was misquote which completely changed the nature of what I was saying. That's not acceptable to me. Mistakes can happen but when they do it's my opinion that the person making the mistake should own it.<br /><br />You say you're not judging me and I'll take that at face value. It's unfortunate that it feels very much like you are, and have been. <br /><br />My tone regarding the thoughts of adoptees was intentional. It was in direct reaction to your words, "I am so glad that you felt happy and sheltered and loved and cared for in your childhood. But this is not the case for everyone. You say you "shudder to think" what "negative" thoughts about adoption would have done to the teen you. Well, some of us had "negative" feelings despite coming from pretty sheltered, loving, and cushy backgrounds (in other words a "positive" adoption). Certain thoughts were always there inside me: wondering who I was born to be, rather than who I was adopted to be. Whom I resembled. Whose talents I inherited. And so on."<br /><br />This came across as full of tone directed toward me and yes, I reacted. Those types of feelings are not unique to you or me, my best guess is they're likely universal to anyone who doesn't know who their biological family is. Just because I am not negatively affected by being adopted doesn't mean I'm not an adoptee, entitled to my voice and my feelings. I've never once said people who are affected shouldn't have a voice. They should! I feel badly that they've been affected and for me it extends to all concerned, not just adoptees which is another thing that makes me "unpopular" with adoptees such as yourself.<br /><br />I'm well aware that life is messy and that people aren't always nice. You and I are doing a very good job of providing proof of that now aren't we?Campbellhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13600505149020853906noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5210353425616744235.post-22387177025532301202010-02-20T09:38:05.881-08:002010-02-20T09:38:05.881-08:00Campbell, we are obviously remembering the convers...Campbell, we are obviously remembering the conversation that we had elsewhere differently. You know what you said to a particular teenager. I can say no more about that. <br /><br />What I find perplexing is that you are so bothered by people responding to quotations from your own opinions and arguments. That's how discourse works. When you form an argument, you need evidence. Someone says something, and then another person agrees or disagrees. The use of quotations helps the person being addressed understand which part of a statement is being questioned and addressed. Sometimes people twist and misquote, certainly, and that is not desirable. But I see quotations as someone taking what I've said seriously and thinking about it, even if it's in a way I hadn't intended or thought about. Then I can respond and clarify, or not. <br /><br />Of course I think that you are entitled to your opinions. I have never said that you weren't. I am not judging you, I am engaging with you to exchange ideas.<br /><br />I am sorry that your teen years were troubled. As you had painted them, I took it that you had been pretty fortunate. Your problems with your amom may certainly have had nothing whatsoever to do with adoption. Lucky you. One less thing to worry about. <br /><br />My aparents didn't allow me to voice questions about the very stuff that is fundamental to being adopted. I am finally getting those questions answered by my natural brother. So I find it very condescending that you said the following: <br /><br />"Wow!!!! Me too Newhall. How weird is that? Oh wait, maybe it's because we're both adopted. Did you ever wonder if your mom may be famous? I did, because her name is the name of a famous actress that I like. I wondered also once if my math teacher might be my mom since she was short, had red hair, and nobody liked her but me. Turned out she wasn't. Damn, eh? That would have saved me so much trouble searching."<br /><br />You could have summed it up better with a "Duh, dumbass!" Because that's how your tone comes across. Tone, as well as word choice, can display the lack of care and responsibility that are so important to you: "It's the lack of care and responsibility I'm talking about in my post."<br /><br />You wrote, "I shudder to think how this adoption blog and forum society would have messed with the "teen me". It's messes with me now!" <br /><br />You expressed bewilderment that I took this to mean that you were concerned about negative things in the forums and blogs. I don't remember it being common practice to shudder to think about positive things. Okay, perhaps that is your practice. I'm open to it. But the rest of your paragraph expresses concern about a pile of negativity: <br /><br />"I see bullying, tunnel vision, words that are twisted, a poorly worded sentence in a multi paragraph post attacked, and I see intimidation, all of which are part and parcel of this way of communicating and if you put yourself out there it's a risk you run. I know this, and I can take it. My issue is, what is it doing to young people who are trying to find their way? Trying to make it through one of the hardest parts of life?" <br /><br />You know, life is messy. People aren't always nice. People twist words and refuse to own what they've said or done, or act superciliously all the time. I see this at my job, and in my community, every day. In my opinion, and this is just my opinion, I think that teens know this already. Those on the forums and blogs see our behavior and decide for themselves which models they care to emulate. We can't clean up the world and make it a sterile environment without anger, rage, or sadness for impressionable youth. It would be nice if we could, and we can protect them when we can. But if they feel those emotions, they absolutely need a place to vent them, to feel seen and heard.Katharinehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01533662877822544180noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5210353425616744235.post-81878533689368833392010-02-20T06:20:17.762-08:002010-02-20T06:20:17.762-08:00Anonymous...you're all over the place.
"...Anonymous...you're all over the place.<br /><br />"Their feelings need to be validated by their own kind- not adoptive parents, and not adoptees who refuse to see the damage adoption causes."<br /><br />I thought that this was one of the biggest issues? Adoptive parents not validating their kids feelings. Also, if your saying that I'm an adoptee that refuses to see the damage adoption causes, you're out of line.... but thanks for giving me the opportunity to give a shout out to adoptees who refuse to see that adoption doesn't always cause damage to the adoptee. <br /><br />"Adopted teens have a higher rate of suicide, drug use, pregnancy, etc" <br /><br />Is that a fact? Higher than whom? <br /><br /><br />"I applaud the adults who let teen adoptees know that their feelings of despair are completely natural for being in an unnatural situation" <br /><br />I applaud this too.<br /><br />"Teens who know that adoption is a huge issue in their life, and a negative one at that, are ahead of the game as far as their mental health status goes."<br /><br />If a teen is being affected negatively by adoption and knows that it's the cause then I agree, they are way ahead of the game as far as their mental health status goes.Campbellhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13600505149020853906noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5210353425616744235.post-24727023650995701982010-02-20T05:59:16.379-08:002010-02-20T05:59:16.379-08:00Jenna...It seems like you're referencing a top...Jenna...It seems like you're referencing a topic posted on a particular forum about abortion vs. adoption, not me. You're not the only one who thought it "seemed" I took it to mean someone was suicidal. I didn't say anything remotely like that, it was others who conjured that all up. I won't go back over all that was said but you might want to so you can get your story straight. My blog post covered far more more than adoptees talking to other adoptees on a single forum. I'm removing your post as it's a little too specific to a particular situation for my liking.Campbellhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13600505149020853906noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5210353425616744235.post-79073810731506216352010-02-20T05:30:52.989-08:002010-02-20T05:30:52.989-08:00Hey Newhall.
Ok, your first paragraph, misreprese...Hey Newhall.<br /><br />Ok, your first paragraph, misrepresentation and you know it.<br /><br />I too wish you'd had someone around when you were a teen to let you know you weren't alone.<br /><br />Not sure I've ever said that I "felt happy and sheltered and loved and cared for in my childhood". At times it felt very much the opposite with the way my mom was. So much so that I ran away at 15. It was a very high pressure situation that I had to escape or go crazy. This all had nothing to do with the fact that I was adopted but to do with the fact my mom sucked at being a mom to a teenager like me. Given all that, I do shudder to think how this adoption blog and forum society would have messed with the "teen me". As I said in my post, it's messes with me now! <br /><br />See now, this is what I'm talking about. You took what I said and changed it to suit your purpose, and used quotations to boot. What you just wrote, quoting me was, You say you "shudder to think" what "negative" thoughts about adoption would have done to the teen you. Well, some of us had "negative" feelings despite coming from pretty sheltered, loving, and cushy backgrounds (in other words a "positive" adoption).<br /> <br />What I really wrote was,<br />I shudder to think how this adoption blog and forum society would have messed with the "teen me". It's messes with me now! I read and react, sometimes comment, most times refrain. Some people take care reacting to what I say, many don't. I watch others post and comment and then deal with the backlash if what they've said isn't well received. I see bullying, tunnel vision, words that are twisted, a poorly worded sentence in a multi paragraph post attacked, and I see intimidation, all of which are part and parcel of this way of communicating and if you put yourself out there it's a risk you run. I know this, and I can take it. My issue is, what is it doing to young people who are trying to find their way? Trying to make it through one of the hardest parts of life?<br /><br />As an adoptive adult, why are on earth would you have a problem with me saying that? <br /><br />"Certain thoughts were always there inside me: wondering who I was born to be, rather than who I was adopted to be. Whom I resembled. Whose talents I inherited. And so on." <br /><br />Wow!!!! Me too Newhall. How weird is that? Oh wait, maybe it's because we're both adopted. Did you ever wonder if your mom may be famous? I did, because her name is the name of a famous actress that I like. I wondered also once if my math teacher might be my mom since she was short, had red hair, and nobody liked her but me. Turned out she wasn't. Damn, eh? That would have saved me so much trouble searching.<br /><br />I'm really sorry your parents refused to think your troubles had anything to do with your adoption. Your therapists too. <br /><br />The therapists I got dragged to were usually useless because they were friends or acquaintances of my moms so I always felt they were biased. I eventually got myself to my own therapist and it was completely empowering. The guy basically said to me, "has it ever occurred to you, Campbell, your mom may be the crazy one here?" I never looked back.<br /> <br />You say back in the 70's and 80's, it was sacrilege to speak a negative thought about adoption. That was not my experience.<br /><br />I too think it's great for people of all ages to talk about things on the internet. It's amazing to be able to connect with people from all over the world. It's the lack of care and responsibility I'm talking about in my post.Campbellhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13600505149020853906noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5210353425616744235.post-77209524849087290592010-02-19T19:10:27.514-08:002010-02-19T19:10:27.514-08:00This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.Jennahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09548140576365758466noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5210353425616744235.post-2664435740718472892010-02-19T15:16:06.012-08:002010-02-19T15:16:06.012-08:00When I was a teenager (back in the 80's) I was...When I was a teenager (back in the 80's) I was very much anti-adoption, as I am today. I so wish there had been a place for me as a teen to discuss and validate my feelings with like minded people.<br /><br />EPAnonymousnoreply@blogger.com